A holistic approach helps men align body, heart, mind, and spirit in a way that helps him fully express who he is sexually, creates connection with others, and gives him freedom to really be himself—both in and out of the bedroom.
He learns about the nuances of his body so that he is embodies in his sexual expression. He is aware and confidant of the body’s innate sensuality and is able to use this in how he engages sexually with another.
The mind is often said to be the greatest of sexual organs. This is so because often misunderstandings surrounding sex happen here—married sex vs. single sex, madonna-whore complex, beliefs on sexual orientation and preference—reside in the mind. The mind is also the space for sexual fantasies that can be used to explore what is essential for sexual satisfaction.
Emotions—love, joy, sadness, hurt, anger, rage—all used in the exploration of intimacy. How being able to express emotions can assist in creating a loving and open-hearted foundation for sexual openness, exploration and the receiving and giving of pleasure.
Spirituality, as seen through the spiritual lens, is the space where connection and disconnection exist. For some it can also mean accessing peak experiences of love, oneness, and healing. And for others, perhaps being in deep communion with the Divine.
It is a myth that men are on and off buttons and that they should want sex all the time.
Intimacy is different for men and women.
Life events—both positive and negative, normal and out of the box—impact how men desire, express, and engage sexually.
There are many causes of sexual health concerns for men: Stress, anxiety, medical issues, and even positive life events may lead to problems in sexual functioning and interest.
Most of the reasons why men don’t engage sexually is “normal.” The problem is that many don’t know this and they do most certainly don’t know how to ask or inquire about it.
Culture and society often reinforces the myth that men should want sex all the time.
Male sexuality is complex and multilayered.
In fact, men report that they want to feel connection with themselves and their partners during sex. Many do not know how to create this or even ask for this.
Especially relevant is that men also have certain requirements for intimacy.
There are many causes of sexual health concerns for men.
Some are physical and require a medical doctor to assess hormones and other physiological conditions that may be causing a problem.
Others are related to stress, anxiety, or life concerns that lead to problems in sexual functioning and interest.
Therapy or counseling provide a form of talk therapy * that creates a safe space to find clear and workable solutions.
Holistic male sexuality advocates having not just one sexuality, but several through out our lifetime.
The lack of knowledge consequently leaves men more often than not thinking that there is something wrong, shutting down, and not seeking help.
Most cultures do not educate men on the life span changes of their sexual selves. Many expect to have the same stamina and desire throughout their life and when there is a shift in libido, they shut down rather than seeing this as an invitation to explore and evolve new facets of their sexuality.
In the last few decades, there has been a change in the roles in intimate relationships between men and women.
In my work with couples, what I consistently see as a central issue is unmet desires and emotional needs in the relationship.
Men often report that they have a difficult time sharing their full sexual expression in their relationships because of misunderstandings about desire, objectification of sex (and women is is often a sexual requirement although not PC),
As a result, the expectations of men in intimate relationships has also changed yet there are contradicting cultural beliefs that lead men to feel alone and disconnected.
There exists a confusing polarity in what it means to be a modern man leaving many uncertain how to be in their intimate relationships.
Sessions focus on helping men explore their sexual self, finds ways to feel free in their sexual expression, and learning ways to communicate needs to others, if so desired, that allows sex to be more mutually satisfying.
COMMONLY HELPED ISSUES:
- Difficulty getting or sustaining an erection
- Low libido
- Difficulty with sexual arousal
- Lack of sexual communication with a partner
- Coping with a partner’s health issue
- Uneven desire in a relationship
- Sexual boredom
- Compulsive masturbation or sexual behaviors
- Shame around sexuality or sexual expression
- Restoring sexuality after cancer or addiction recovery
- Sexually compulsive behavior including sex, pornography use, and masturbation
- Infidelity and infidelity patterns
- Conflict with religious or cultural beliefs
- Sexual trauma
*Sex therapy does not involve any form of physical contact, nudity, or sexual behavior between client and therapist.